free write friday//confession


{what i wore}
emerald green dress//c.o. persunmall (buy here)
drop necklace//caroline hill (buy here) check my facebook page later for an exclusive 20% off coupon good for anything in the collection!
cat eye sunnies//c.o. oasap (buy here)
globe watch//urban outfitters (buy similar here)
gold bangles//pb&j boutique (buy here)
green opaque tights//welovecolors (buy here)
ankle booties//target (buy here)
confession: i secretly want to be an actress.

i took various type of theatre classes all through college, but after one very awkward, freak out, audition, i chickened out of ever trying out for anything again.
(it was bad, like Tom Haverford faking an Australian accent on the last Parks and Rec, bad...)
i wish i were braver. 
everyone i've ever heard talk about it, says it gets easier with every try, but i have serious fear of failure, so i miss out on the chance of success.
sometimes i have a hard time being where i am now. i look at those i admire and think to myself, if i'm not that good (at photography, at design, and art, at acting...), i might as well not try--there are obviously too many people more talented than me.
when in reality, when i think about it, i know there are tons of people around me, who might not even be as 'good' as me, but since they're doing something about it, they will soon enough, be better for it.

i've had this conversation inside my head dozen of times, and even with marcus a few more, and yet here i sit, still afraid failing. still afraid of trying.

what's something you wish you would do, but haven't yet?
what helps you be braver?


Erin said...

I'm really loving the colors you have paired together with this look. The green and teal work so well together!

Courtney Ramsey said...

Love how you styled this dress!

I wish I was braver at times as well. It's so easier to stick with whats comfortable and not take that step (or giant leap) into something unknown. I'm working on it!

xo, Courtney

Jessica Wilson said...

I TOTALLY wish I was braver sometimes. But then I realized that I am. I have the gospel as my knowledge, and I have a Heavenly Father who loves me dearly. Right now I'm waiting for my boyfriend to get home from his internship. It's been 4 months and I only have a month and a half to go. Yet it can be tough. Just keep telling yourself "Look how far I have come" and "Day at a time" and somehow days become weeks, and weeks become months and you're finally where you need to be.

Michaela said...

I can SO relate to this. Afraid of failing is so me and so lame. Let's just stop being afraid together, okay?

This quote from one of my very favorite speeches (Steve Job's commencement address for Stanford) helps me out when I feel like that, (which is all the time) and maybe it will help you too.

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."

Go for it girl! You've got a lot of people cheering you on.

Amber Hendricks said...

My confession of the day is that I just watched [nearly] all of your video tutorials and read your "us" "a rare chain of events" and "a lovely love story" and I want to be real life friends. We were so so so close to moving to Arizona for dental school, and now I am terribly sad it didn't happen, because we could have been couple friends! You are so fun, I wish we had known each other in high school but I went to gilbert and you westwood, so I guess it makes sense we never crossed paths. P.s. I wish that outfit was mine.

Beverly Houpt said...

And I kinda maybe wanna be an actress too, haha. I took one class my sophomore year of college and it was super fun! I thinks it's a bit of a risky career, though, in the sense that women are expected to agree to all sorts of "questionable" things that come along with entertaining.

Sarah44 said...

I totally understand this. I have always wanted to secretly be an actress too. But it is hard, and scary. The fear of rejection definitely makes us not want to do things. I am sure you are amazing. The key is to be confident, and realize "hey if I fail, then whatever I will try again." No one starts off being amazing at something. People always work hard to get better.

Sarah44 said...

P.S. I like your outfit.

madeline said...

maybe you've seen this already, but maybe you haven't.

keep on trucking girl! you've got great taste! (-:

Ashley Bagley Nielson said...

oh my gosh, i loved that soooo much! thank you a million times for sharing! so good.

Chevron andLace said...

Sounds like you've got a bad case of learned helplessness! It's a very difficult psychological obstacle to overcome, but can be done!
My dad was always my number one fan. He always supported me in whatever I did and encouraged me to try new things. When I would talk about the latest thing I wanted to try out for, a play, dance team, etc., he would always say, "If you don't try out, you're guaranteed not to make it." That's why I tried out for the World Dance team in college (and somehow miraculously made it and had the best semester of my life), tried out for Cheerleading in Junior High (another great experience) started my Etsy shop, and tried a thousand other things that I have not once regretted.
And if you try something and figure out you're no good at it, (pole-vaulting and all of track in general), you can always think to yourself, "Hey! If it weren't for people like me, none of you would be winners!"
The one thing I haven't tried yet is trying out for something REALLY big. Ever since I got married and started getting into American Idol, I've had this secret desire to try out, not necessarily because I think I'd make it very far, but to see what the judges would say and just to have the experience!
What a great post to start our blogging friendship on. New follower, for sure!

Sue // Chevron & Lace

Jenny Severson said...

I can sympathize with feeling like there are already so many people that are better than me at the thing I want to try. Technology has taken away a lot of the opportunity for originality because we see things already being done all the time and back away from pursuing it. Wish I had the answer for overcoming those feelings. I really enjoy your blog. What lipstick are you wearing here?

Kimberly Bonham said...

Love this entire look on you. Gorgeous!

Kelsey Eaton said...

I struggle with this like crazy!

Julietta said...

Hello dear,
may I ask you which size have your ordered in the dress? I want to order it too, but I'm unsure about the sizing....

Ashley Bagley Nielson said...

I ordered a large. I wanted it to fit more boxy than it did on the model plus I wanted the extra length. Hope that helps! Good luck :)

DIANE said...

Pretty shoes and outfit! :)

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